Gah, I hate days like today. Yesterday was so great. Totally perfect, full of family and friend fun, a great Super Bowl game, complete with Tom Petty playing at halftime and Eli Manning pulling out the win.

But today – ugh today – I have mastitis so I’m miserable with that. I’m tired and cranky and have errands to do and cleaning to take care of. And I just don’t want to. I have projects to take pictures of and share here. But somehow transferring and uploading  photos seems like a daunting task at the moment.

I think it may have a lot to do with spending an hour in the car today. My stereo isn’t working in there (hubby can’t remember the unlock password on it) so I don’t have anything to entertain myself in the car other than chattering children and my own thoughts. And I think because today started as an already emotional day for me – I cried when an online purchase at Best Buy took for-ever – that I just took that and ran with it and spent an hour thinking about what kind of person I am. Who my friends and what’s important to me. I got thinking about forgiveness and unconditional love and support and because Monkey’s 1st birthday is coming, I got thinking about this time last year and this time the year before and how everything has changed so much. I got thinking about how a little old person like me can think I’m a good person but have mad so many mistakes in my life.  I know I’m not perfect, I don’t expect to be – but the list is long and depressing. I try hard. I think I’m a loyal friend and family member. I put others’ needs before my own a lot. I practice forgiveness and moving on from the past. At least where it’s accepted and warranted. Some people make it hard by not being able to let go themselves. I tell the people I care about how much I love them often and I show it even more often. But I stumble. A lot. And it gets me down. I guess all I can hope for is a better day tomorrow and I’ll just keep plugging away at today.

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